Kookie

Written to the song "You Have Won Me" by Bethel, Featuring Brian Johnson.

I had a dream last night about my wife. We we're meeting for the first time in at some retreat in southern Oregon. As you would expect, I only remember bits and pieces. But I remember one thing very clearly, the passionate interest and most genuine excitement I felt and saw returned on my wife's face.

When I woke up, I was overpowered with these feelings. Though, as I realized it was a dream I felt a sense of displacement, a sense of cold. Immediately I thought "Is this because this feeling is missing from my marriage?" Thankfully, the answer is no. Especially lately, we've really been the closest we've ever been. Right after that moment, I started to remember too many times where I've experienced this feeling, so I tried to recall it's rebuttal.

I had a previous, lengthy, romance with another woman but, eventually, I ruined the relationship with my selfishness and when I suffered the brokenness from it I discovered the passionate interest and excitement had been misplaced all along.

Romance was the right place for me to put those feelings and make that investment... But, it was with whom the romance was shared that was the problem. I think I've learned that that displacement and cold sense I experience when awaking to reality is like a calling. A call to seek and worship our Creator.

Shortly after this thought I chose to continue reading Mark chapter 5, which is apart of a schedule I've adopted to read through the New Testament. I felt like I was "mining" the Scriptures this morning. Laboring to find something to align the displacement, reignite the pilot. I found passages that I've read times before so I finished the chapter and moped around a bit.

Then I put on the Bethel song I mentioned above. If you watch the music video, you'll quickly discover they're a bunch of kookie Christians. And as embarrassing as it may be, sometimes, to associate yourself with people who act like that: I still love it.

I don't know if you've ever sung with a group of people to our creator before, but it's really special. I don't know how to describe it fully. It's like everything comes together in one... massive... perfect... universally recognized... moment of Life complete. Like the most perfect breath of fresh air. As a result you have no reservation toward your behavior except to dance, or something.

Anyway, I put that song on my speakers this morning and let it fill my house. Soon, after a few times of listening and singing to the song, I remembered what I read in Mark. How Jesus brought a little girl back to life and "... Jesus gave them strict orders not to tell anyone..." ~ Mark 5:43 - yet - it seems like every time Jesus says this people do the exact opposite. They go out and "... tell everyone the great things Jesus had done for him; and everyone was amazed at what he told them." ~ Mark 5:20

I don't really have much knowledge as to why Jesus told people not to tell anyone about what he did. But I'm sure if I sought out the answer it would end up like every other time I've sought out the answer to questions that provoked doubt and disbelief in me about Jesus and the Scriptures: "... and Spencer was amazed at what He told him."

Spread the Good News about God today. Who he is, his nature and character. Then watch people act a little kookie with amazement at what God has done.